By Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin MS, LCPC While you may expect this question to be reserved for newlyweds, unfortunately, there are couples who are grandparents still asking this question. I find this question to be one of the most destructive questions you could ask about your marriage. Living with an unhappy marriage can be one of [...]
I know there are some people who say “I wish,” but there are some people for whom this issue is a real problem – they feel they are being loved too much. This can feel like you are being smothered, and while a little bit is good for a relationship, there does come a time [...]
Sometimes people think that divorce is caused by major sources of conflict. In reality, it is usually smaller sources of conflict that are left unresolved and eventually they become big sources of conflict. Division of labor is one of those issues that can lead to big conflicts. Division of labor includes the day to day [...]
Unemployment has a range of effects on people. Some take it in stride while others become seriously depressed. Unemployment also places a serious pressure on the finances of those affected. Add a spouse, children, credit card debt, and a mortgage to the mix and the end result can be a real strain on the marriage. [...]
Modern society enjoys freedoms that our forefathers would not only frown upon, most likely condemn. Living together ‘out of holy wedlock’ is certainly one of those freedoms. It has come at a price, however, as couples who live together without the legal ties of marriage find it much easier to move on if the relationship [...]
The United States is a united states in more ways than one. Today’s society is a multicultural mix that often bares little resemblance to the many original cultures that have gone into this mix. Unfortunately, or fortunately (depending on point of view), there are still large ethnic pockets throughout the country. That doesn’t mean that [...]
Most children have a little ‘naughty’ streak. It’s actually a healthy sign and part of growing up. Some children do put a real strain on marriages, however, especially those that are diagnosed with problems such as ADHD. Children can also come under the influence of peers leading to problems with alcohol and drugs. Dealing with [...]
When one partner has depression, it can have a big impact on the marriage. People with depression tend to isolate themselves, have less energy, and can be more irritable and all of these can put a strain on the relationship. The other partner is sometimes left feeling confused, lonely, and overwhelmed. When one partner is [...]
While much of our focus on this blog is on saving marriages, sometimes a marriage is just not salvageable. The end result is the divorce courts, and while most divorces can be worked out amicably, there are times when issues lead to quite a traumatic experience. This is particularly true when violence, alcohol, drugs and/or [...]
In the 2007 film, The Heartbreak Kid, Ben Stiller portrays a newlywed who married his dream girl–or so he thought. After dating this woman for a short time, and marrying her to keep her from moving across the ocean, his sweetie becomes someone he can’t stand to be around and subsequently divorces. I recently saw [...]
What is the big “D” ultimatum? DIVORCE! Should you use the threat of divorce to force change in your partner? Should you use any form of ultimatum when your marriage is heading downhill? The problem with using any form of ultimatum is twofold – the first, it often gets used too often with no follow [...]
A common complaint in many marriages surrounds issues with in-laws. The role that your parents and your partner’s parents play in your life can have a big impact on your marriage. Successfully being able to separate from your parents when you are married is very important. If you or your spouse relies heavily on your [...]
Everyone will experience a loss at some point in their lives; many already have. If you or your partner have lost a loved one, you know what a tumultuous time that can be. Grief is defined as a “keen mental suffering or distress over affliction or loss; sharp sorrow; painful regret.” According to Elizabeth Kübler-Ross, [...]
I’ll be blunt. If you have to ask that question, then in nine out ten situations the answer is yes. If you are having any doubts at all about your marriage, then you really should be talking to someone about those doubts. Ideally, you should be talking to your partner – if you can’t, then [...]
Despite popular opinion to the contrary, marriage counseling is not that expensive. Sure, you could travel to places like New York and spend thousands on a high profile therapist, but they are the exception, not the norm. There are couples who still struggle to find the money to pay for marriage counseling. That doesn’t mean [...]
Anger is an emotion that everyone has and it has developed a sort of negative connotation. Anger in itself is not a bad thing. Many good things have come out of people being angry. Anger has led to positive changes in society when people’s rights are being violated. We should feel some anger when we [...]
They say that ‘money is the root of all evil’. They may be right since money is one of the leading causes of conflict in a relationship. There are times when fortune doesn’t favor us and the end result can be a mountain of debt, creditors constantly at the door, and the bank ready to [...]
It is very important for couples to have their own friends and to maintain friendships, apart from their partner. Having a girls’ night out or guys spending a day playing a round of golf can be beneficial in lots of ways. Although your partner should be your main confidant, being able to talk and laugh [...]
Selling a private counseling practice can be almost as hard as setting up a private counseling practice from scratch. Often, the value in the practice is in the practitioner themselves, so the minute they walk out the door, so too does the business. This can make selling quite difficult. However, there are a number of [...]
Are you wondering if your marriage can be saved? Have you heard the words “not in love”? In just four minutes, you can watch, Hope, You Can Save Your Marriage. In this video, you’ll: Renew hope for your marriage Hear about the normal life-cycle of a marriage Learn the most common mistake couples make when [...]
The average American loves taking vacations. Unfortunately, most of us can only get away once a year. Taking a vacation with your partner is simply not an option. You need the time away from the stress of everyday life at least once a year, if not twice. I’d like to share the top reasons why [...]
We enter into relationships for a variety of reasons – companionship, love, and to be part of a family are just a few. Healthy happy marriages actually bring a lot of benefits to the couple, benefits that single people could not even imagine. If you’re married, think about whether or not you can relate to [...]
Perhaps you have wondered if you or maybe your partner may have an anxiety disorder. There are several different types of anxiety. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder results after someone has been exposed to a traumatic experience. Panic Disorder causes people feel symptoms of panic that come out of the blue. Generalized Anxiety causes people to [...]
Marriage counseling can be a deeply personal experience for some people so placing trust in a marriage counselor can be difficult. Marriage counselors that are based around a religious community – for example, Christian Marriage Counseling – are often able to overcome that barrier. For these individuals, nothing is as deeply personal as their religion, [...]
Chances are we all know someone who has struggled with depression at some time in their life. According to the National Institute of Mental Health, major depression affects about 6.7 % of the US adult population in a given year. You may know someone who is struggling with depression, and this person could even be [...]
Anxiety is one of the most common hidden problems in US households. We all suffer from anxiety to some extent and that is a healthy state. However, some people live a life in which anxiety is ever present. These are the people who seem to live with a sense of doom, or who suffer panic [...]
Parenting can be a source of conflict for lots of couples. Many couples disagree on discipline practices with their children. When one parent is stricter and the other parents wants to be more laid back, this can be frustrating not only for the couple, but also the children. Maybe you agree on the big issues [...]
It’s Monday night. You and your partner are sitting on the couch, unwinding after a long day. The kids are asleep, and you have the next two hours to spend together. Instead, you’re streaming Netflix on your TV, your eyes are fixated on your laptop, and you’re compulsively checking your phone every two minutes for [...]
It’s a common scenario seen in marriage counselor offices across the country: differences in spending habits. One partner saves and the other spends. Disagreements over money can cause stress, conflict, tension, and a negative home environment. Furthermore, in the United States, finances are also a major cause of divorce. So how do you protect your [...]
When most people get married they go on a honeymoon – supposedly to get to know one another. These days, couples often know each other very well. Many having lived together before the wedding. When we talk about a marriage’s “honeymoon period”, we are talking well beyond the actual honeymoon. The ‘honeymoon period’ can last [...]
