This is a sequel to my earlier post about interesting ideas for kids’ gifts and activities. Another suggestion is to visit all the NASA web sites. Start with the main NASA site and go around to other sites as well. The NASA sites have age appropriate activities in all sorts of math and science geared [...]
Christmas may have passed by the time this entry is posted. Nevertheless, it’s always the season to think about getting toys for kids. Birthday and anniversary presents and gifts for others are always needed. I want to throw out some ideas that may not have occurred to you. But, first, I want to raise another [...]
The way people interpret their partner’s actions makes a big difference in the marriage. It’s important to remember that your assumptions aren’t always correct. There may be many other possible conclusions that can be drawn about your spouse’s behaviors. In fact, many people jump to the wrong conclusion. This can lead to people feeling hurt, angry, [...]
In the last year or so, there has been a lot of media attention on a serious problem with kids—bullying. Many children have committed suicide. Others have gone into deep depression. On an adult level, we’ve seen deaths and injuries of young women and women who have had to experience hazing to be accepted. Several [...]
First, let me start out by saying thanks to all of those who followed us on Facebook! Apparently we made a mistake when we created the page, so we had to make a new one because Facebook would not let us change it. If you are still interested in following us on facebook, please like [...]
Anger can cause problems in a marriage. How people behave when they are angry can contribute to a breakdown in the marriage. Sometimes people don’t recognize that their anger is a problem. It can be helpful to spend some time thinking about how you handle your anger and how this impacts your relationship. Think about [...]
The decision about whether or not to seek fertility treatments is never an easy one to make. There are lots of things to consider. A couple who is having difficulty conceiving should weigh their options before automatically pursuing treatments. Sometimes the stress of not being able to conceive can take a toll on a couple. [...]
Winter is here for many of us. Less sunlight, snow, clouds, rain, being shut in—these are the ingredients of a season that leads many of us to gloom. I have a few suggestions, but I want to preface my remarks by saying that I know many of us in this economy do not have all [...]
In my last post, I talked about some considerations that are often forgotten during the divorce. There are lots more comments. There is one serious comment I want to make, which has short, medium, and long-range consequences. Part of it comes down to this: divorcing people don’t think of all the issues to cover when [...]
In the last post, I made some recommendations about how to begin thinking about what you should do when you and your partner are splitting. I mentioned that there are some short, medium, and long range issues about which to think. I want to make some general comments before going on. These comments are made [...]
You and your partner have decided to split. You have kids at home. What should you be thinking about in terms of their short run, medium run, and long-term needs? I raise this long question because I hear all sorts of stories as I counsel couples. I also see children, both kids and adults, who [...]
Discovering your spouse has had an affair can be devastating. Many couples don’t survive after an affair. The added stress, the emotional response, and the strain on the relationship can be too much for many couples to bear. Learning how to respond to the affair and deal with emotions is a determining factor in whether [...]
If you don’t purposely take time out of your schedule for your marriage, you might find that you don’t end up devoting enough time to your relationship. It’s important to plan for spending time together as a couple. Otherwise, you might find that time slips by without taking time out to renew your relationship. Many [...]
Sometimes people consider marriage counseling but don’t follow through with finding a counselor because they are uncertain. They wonder, can marriage counseling help with our problems? Do we really need marriage counseling? It is important to educate yourself about counseling if questions like these are preventing you from attending. Marriage counseling can address a variety [...]
Sometimes each person in a relationship tries to show why their preferences are superior. They may discuss how morally their choices are better. It’s important to respect one another’s preferences without determining that one is more superior to the other. Look at some of the differences between your preferences and your spouse’s preferences. How do you [...]
Nagging doesn’t work. Especially not in the long run. Yet many people still nag their spouse. Women, especially, are often guilty of nagging their husbands. There are some serious negative consequences of nagging that can cause marital problems. Women often nag their husbands because they feel that if they don’t, their husband won’t get things [...]
When people are angry with themselves, their anger impacts all areas of their life. Feeling angry at yourself is going to interfere with relationships, work, and how you feel about yourself in general. If you’ve done something wrong, it’s important to learn how to deal with the consequences effectively. When you’ve made a mistake, you [...]
There’s a recent movie called The Dilemma. It’s about what happens when some guy’s buddy thinks about telling the truth about seeing his friend with a woman not his wife. Should you always tell the truth? What if the truth has unforeseen consequences? Are you responsible—completely, partly? Should you help or be required to pick [...]
Sometimes one person in a relationship goes to great lengths to prevent natural consequences. This can lead to that person becoming stressed and overwhelmed. It can also cause resentment to build. Sometimes, it is okay to allow for natural consequences to run their course. Wives especially seem to be guilty of trying to prevent consequences, [...]
This is always a timely question, but particularly around the holiday season. We will be going over to the houses of family and friends. Somebody may be there who has hurt us deeply. Should we let bygones be bygones, should we not go, or should we confront them? These are some thoughts. Not everyone is [...]
Sometimes people become complacent in their marriage. They think that their relationship isn’t all that fun or exciting, but it is comfortable. This can often happen after a few years of marriage. People choose to deal with this feeling differently. Some people separate believing that the grass is greener somewhere else. Other people accept mediocrity. [...]
What you think about impacts how you feel. The more you think about something that causes you to feel angry, the angrier you will feel. Thought stopping is an effective tool that can help you manage your anger. When people feel angry, sometimes they tend to dwell on whatever caused them to feel that way. [...]
When a couple experiences infertility, a variety of emotions and problems can result. Sadly, many couples fail to maintain intimacy during this time. They may feel isolated as they try to deal with this painful and personal matter. Seeking support is very important when dealing with infertility. Infertility causes a lot of stress. Sadly, many couples aren’t comfortable [...]
When you have a problem, how do you tackle solving it? Research shows that men and women tend to tackle problem solving from different approaches. Women tend to take a more emotion-focused approach while men take a more problem-focused approach. Think of the last time you were distressed. Perhaps you were angry with a co-worker [...]
Please show your support for our blog by following us on our new facebook page. http://www.facebook.com/marriagecounselingblog We realize we are a little behind in adding our content to facebook, but we hope the new facebook page will be helpful for those who prefer that platform for keeping up with blogs. Thanks for the support!
Many people talk about creating a bucket list that includes all the things they want to do before they “kick the bucket.” However, many people set out with individual goals they want to reach. Others resign themselves to the fact that they won’t ever reach the goals and dreams they once had and they consider [...]
Whether you struggle to manage your frustrations about traffic, have difficulty tolerating your spouse’s bad habits, or arrive home from work still angry, it’s important to learn skills to help you manage your anger. If you struggle to manage your anger it’s likely to impact your marriage in several different ways. When people experience chronic [...]
Creating holiday traditions and rituals can be good for your marriage. Having special activities you do together can help you feel more like a cohesive unit. It can also help you create memories for years to come. It’s important to look at your current holiday traditions. Do you have any? Sometimes people don’t even recognize [...]
Do you trust in your partner’s parenting skills? When you aren’t home do you feel secure in your partner doing a good job with the children? Or do you worry that your partner doesn’t do as good of a job as you do? It’s imperative for the health of your marriage as well as for [...]
Many people don’t ever seek counseling. Even people who are referred to therapy by a doctor often refuse to seek services. Unfortunately, many individuals and couples don’t get the help they need due to their attitudes about therapy. It’s important to look at your underlying concerns about therapy if you are hesitant to seek help. [...]
