Stuart and Leah had recently gotten married and were having the time of their lives, traveling and exploring the world and genuinely getting to know one another. When they returned home, after a year of roaming the world, the trouble began. Leah became anxious and worried every time Stuart would leave her side. After a [...]
The marriage counselor knew he had little time and needed to work fast. But this wasn’t a problem. He saw Lynn and Farrel’s problem as manageable and knew he could guide them in the right direction quickly.
Lynn and Farrel were getting married in 6 months. Lynn came from a well-to-do family and put a lot [...]
When Frank and Searah opened a new restaurant, they both felt as if they were fulfilling a lifelong dream. Both were seasoned chefs and Searah had run her own business prior, so they felt they were professionally prepared as well. Until the arguing began. Then they found themselves sitting before a marriage counselor, wondering if [...]
Many people have many different reasons for not attending couples counseling. It ranges from the practical to the moral. Either “I don’t have time or money for it” or “I don’t like airing our dirty laundry. Our problems are our business.” Whatever the reasons, the problems remain the same, unchanged and stagnating. Problems don’t tend [...]
It’s not always easy to manage the time for the work that marriage counseling often entails. Such was the case of Jorge and Marie. Both had started a business that was working in the red for the first few years. They were consumed with making it work and it was putting a great deal of [...]
A common refrain heard from many couples who aren’t attending marriage counseling is, “We don’t have the time” or “We’re planning on it at some point, but not now.” In this day and age where every minute seems full, it is often hard to make the time for counseling. If you have children, there are [...]
Beth explained to the marriage counselor that she had supported Frank through most of college. She was working full-time and he was studying law. When Frank graduated, he quickly landed a position in one of the top law firms in the area. His career was taking off and Beth and Frank finally felt a sense [...]
Psychoanalytic theory was first developed by Sigmund Freud and later expounded upon by Carl Jung, Erik Erikson and a host of others. The idea that propels psychoanalytic theory is that the unconscious mind drives our actions and the more we become aware of and explore the unconscious mind, the more whole we become, as well [...]
Frank and Helen had been married 27 years when Frank was diagnosed with inoperable cancer. He had less than a year to live and it hit the couple blindsided.
Helen explains to the marriage counselor:
We didn’t expect it in a million years. He’s always been so healthy. Finally, when we reach retirement, after working all [...]
One of the most common problems brought to a marriage counselor is problems stemming from financial matters. Nothing can put more immediate strain on a marriage for a number of reasons.
First, financial issues strike deeply. We are concerned about our very survival, which often brings with it immense anxiety and worry as well as [...]
Many of the problems that arise on a daily basis, whether we are married or not, are met in habitual ways. When that woman cuts in front of you illegally on the highway, when that man bumps into you without as much of an “excuse me” in the grocery store - when we deal [...]
Most couples don’t enter marital therapy for enrichment, though some do. A small percentage seek counseling pre-crisis. Perhaps they will be married soon or some just feel a certain stillness in their marriage and seek counseling as a way to rejuvenate their connection. But most couples enter therapy because there is an [...]
When a couple reaches marriage counseling, chances are they are already discouraged. Sometimes this discouragement has been building for years, compounding the lack of perspective. In addition, discouragement is contagious. If one partner is feeling that way, the other is bound to follow.
One of the biggest obstacles counselors face is dealing with [...]
It took a lot to bring Bill and Beth into the counselor’s office. Both were stubborn types who didn’t see much of a reason for marriage counseling - except for the very real fact that their marriage was rapidly going down hill. Bill felt as if Beth didn’t do much to contribute to [...]
When Fannie and Hal arrived at their couples counseling, Hal had trouble entering the office. He felt very uncomfortable entering into therapy and only entered because “she made me,” as he later confessed.
Fannie had taken on a new job several months before. This was the first time she entered the workforce. [...]
Marriage counseling has helped many couple work through complex problems, ranging from infidelity to addiction to sexuality issues. On paper, some of these problems seem too big to move past but two people who are willing to make changes have an incredible amount of power. But there are times when problems or differences [...]
It often seems that the more years pass by, the more we become set in our ways. It becomes harder to be flexible, reach out or try something new. This was the case with Marge and Henry, who had been married for a whopping 54 years before entering couples counseling.
Marge had [...]
Helen and Maria had been living together for years before couples counseling became a complete necessity. Maria had decided to spend time with an ex of hers on a more frequent basis and this was making Helen increasingly uncomfortable. Maria assured her that there was nothing romantic between her and her ex but [...]
Phillip had never told Elizabeth about a longstanding addiction of his, until couples counseling. He had been taking pain medication for many years following a serious car accident. His back was badly injured but after several years of physical therapy, it had healed almost 100%. He continued to take pain medication afterwards, [...]
There are many schools of therapy in which counselors are trained. It is important to ascertain whether a particular direction of study suits you and your partners needs. But there are certain elements you can expect in your first few meetings with your couples counselor, overall.
* The [...]
In the case of Stella and Sam, private counseling seemed like an important choice. Stella had a crippling case of agoraphobia (social phobia) which had only grown worse over the years. Early on in her marriage, Stella managed her phobic reactions. She held down a job and could occasionally go out with [...]
There are couples who wouldn’t consider counseling at first. Take Josh and Anna, a young couple who started off as college sweethearts. Both are very driven individuals, whose chosen profession means a lot to them. When Anna started coming home later and later each night, Josh wrote it off to her new [...]
There are many reasons couples will shy away from counseling when they are in need. For some, it’s seen as a personal failure. Others don’t like the discomfort of revealing personal material to a stranger. And finally, there are many who just don’t understand what couples counseling entails.
It is fairly [...]
It’s not always easy to know when you and your significant other should consider therapy. There are difficult phases in a relationship that may not warrant professional help (though even temporary phases can be smoothed over with the assistance of a trained counselor). Perhaps one member is experiencing unemployment or physical problems and [...]
It’s never easy to discuss the prospect of therapy with a partner. There are many factors to c contend with. Perhaps one partner is very resistant to the idea of therapy for a number of reasons. Some people think of therapy as an admission of failure or shame. Or possibly communication [...]
A common refrain heard from many individuals who would like to enter into couples counseling is, “I’m willing but he’ll never go.” This often halts the progress and healing that therapy offers. Frequently, one member of the duo simply won’t even ask, thinking they know the other partner so well.
Couples counseling is a [...]
No matter what your take is on counseling, one thing can be sure: your life changes after it. Sometimes it stimulates action. This could mean cohesive, focused actions to make your marriage better. It could also indicate the need for a separation, whether temporarily or permanently. Sometimes this is needed [...]
In this day and age, most of us try to integrate some sort of fitness regime into our lives. Some may work out methodically at a local gym while others take on a leisurely stroll after a meal. But the majority recognize the importance of exercise and fitness when it comes to our [...]
Many couples may endure years in a state of denial when they are encountering a chronic relationship issue. And it’s understandable. First of all, problems evolve - they don’t happen overnight. Something that seemed relatively small several years ago may suddenly seem like an angry elephant sitting in the living room. [...]
Starting the counseling process is never easy. We usually encounter many internal roadblocks. There is often a sense of “I can take care of this myself” pride. Somehow we feel like failures for even thinking we need therapy. Shame can prevail but meanwhile, the problems continue.
One element that most people don’t [...]
