The Marriage Counseling Blog

“Fourteen years of being unhappily married…and I don’t think I can take one more day.”

This is what Ralph expressed during his first couples counseling session. His wife nodded in agreement. Both were deeply unhappy. They had gotten married when Ralph was 19 and Teena was 18. She was pregnant. They weren’t in love, they were young and they had no clue how to raise a child. But they did. The child was now an adolescent and they both felt like it was time to move on…but didn’t know how.

Both Teena and Ralph explored the possibility of using marriage counseling as an aid to stay together. They looked at the patterns throughout their marriage and what had lead up to a nearly constant state of squabbling. But after exploring this for some time, they both came back to their original conclusion: they wanted to be divorced. They wanted their marriage to end.

They just wanted to end it civilly. Both were afraid of a protracted battle in court, because of their belligerence with one another so they figured therapy could be a healthier way to resolve issues, so it wouldn’t come to the courtroom.

After about 6 months worth of therapy, they were prepared to move on and begin proceedings. They did some amiably, with very little need, other than the necessary, for legal intervention. Marriage counseling allowed this couple to be on the “same page” and proceed to a place of ending together. It also took some of the edge off of their daily squabbling, since both learned some much needed communication and coping skills.