Counseling - Individual versus Couples
When you enter couples counseling, the marriage counselor will want to evaluate the state of your marriage or relationship with broad questions that will give you both the chance to answer. Occasionally, after a session or two, the counselor may advise individual counseling for you or your spouse or partner.
This was the case of Shirley and Hank, who had been married for over 15 years. Hank had developed a dependency on pain medication from a car accident 5 years earlier. Shirley said Hank was becoming increasingly moody and despondent and she was tired of his “swings.” She felt like she was constantly “walking on eggshells” and “anxious all the time.”
After several sessions, the counselor saw that Hank was suffering from a full blown addiction. Hank was resistant to seeing a separate addictions counselor for quite some time but eventually the counselor insisted on it. He knew his work would only accomplish so much with an addiction standing in the way. Some schools of belief state that addictions can be so profound that in a sense, it “trumps” all other problems. In other words, as long as you have an active addict in a relationship, the counselor simply must address the addiction in order to repair other marital problems.
Hank eventually relented and saw an addictions specialist. His problem was more profound than either his wife or the counselor had suspected and he had to be admitted to a rehab center for close to 6 months. When he was released, he was a new man and able to contend with his marital problems as lucid, drug-free individual. They progressed rapidly and completed therapy after only 3 months.
