Financial Matters as a Need for Counseling
One of the most common problems brought to a marriage counselor is problems stemming from financial matters. Nothing can put more immediate strain on a marriage for a number of reasons.
First, financial issues strike deeply. We are concerned about our very survival, which often brings with it immense anxiety and worry as well as a need to control (or conversely, bury your head in the sand.) Second, money usually represents something between a couple, such as power or even love. Both have individual definitions of money and how it matters in his or her life that stem back to childhood.
Unfortunately couples with pronounced financial problems often can’t seek the assistance of a counselor when they need it the most, because its another expense they feel they can’t afford. Most couples counselors will work with couples on a sliding scale or payment plan, so there are possibilities. In addition, once in counseling, they work through some of their underlying fears of money, making the act of spending it not seem like the end of the world - especially when its as importance as the survival of a marriage.
Financial issues can put a real strain on us individually. We’ve all experienced worry around money at one time or another. Even people who are considered “well-off” have their personalized connection to finances that can be distressing to them. When you couple with someone, there is a commingling of anxieties that takes place. The stakes feel higher and emotions run strong.
Ironically, counseling can be quite helpful during these financially trying times, even when you feel you can’t afford it. Consider it an investment as well as an opportunity to improve your deeply-held beliefs about money, which can often improve your finances ultimately anyway.
