How Incentives Drive your Therapy
Franz had no desire to seek couples counseling with his wife, Liza. He said he felt forced, coerced. They had been having marital problems for over 5 years and Liza had hit her limit. Franz, on the other hand, felt Liz exaggerated their problems, that she was just being “dramatic.” By the time he reached counseling, he was unresponsive and irritable.
Terry and her partner Samantha were both very willing to enter couples therapy when they began experiencing problems within their relationship. Both had seen their parents suffer through years worth of problems without ever seeking help and both refused to go down that road. By the time they reached the counseling office, both were willing and excited to get down to work.
As you can see, these two examples showcase the variety of personality types and incentives that drive people to therapy. Franz was not happy to be in counseling so it posed some initial difficulty in proceeding properly. His “walls” had to be broken down and his irritability overcome before the counselor could address some of the bigger issues. Terry and Samantha, on the other hand, were willing, open and receptive to getting down to business.
Both couples received the help they needed but certainly, a couple’s attitude comes into play when it comes to the success of the treatment. Unfortunately, there is often a partner who is more resistant to therapy than the other. And while counselors are trained to work beyond that, it can often add time to the therapeutic process.
