The Marriage Counseling Blog

You can’t stay married for any length of time without holding a grudge every once in a while. It just happens. We let each other down, we disappoint, and we break trust. Marriage counseling can help couples get over those deep grudges that have taken root in your marriage. It will take some work, even a disciplined state of mind, but it can be worth it.

Holding onto a grudge might stem from a  trust issue. It can also stem from resentment. Both of these root causes lead to hurt and anger. Festering in these emotions means you’re not growing or moving forward. You have to make a choice.

Kathy and John had been going to financial debt counseling for six weeks. They had identified key areas that had led them to the brink of bankruptcy, and the debt counselor had helped them come up with a plan. It was going to take several years to clear up their debt, but now they had a plan.

Kathy found herself still angry and mistrustful of John. His careless charging had been the primary reason they were in credit card debt of more than $20,000. Even though they had gone to counseling and had a plan, Kathy couldn’t seem to let go of the grudge she felt toward John. She checked their online banking and credit card statements daily, and had even peeked into his wallet to see how much cash had spent. Instead of the situation getting better, Kathy just couldn’t let it go.

The debt counselor suggested that Kathy and John try marriage counseling. He shared with them that many couples had to go from debt counseling to marriage counseling. He said that it was normal to have a difficult time trusting again. Kathy and John agreed to give marriage counseling a try.

 

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