Marriage Counseling and the Act of Letting Go
The way couples deal with their interpersonal problems can vary greatly. Often partners will enter marriage counseling, distant and angry with arms folded; they are very closed off and it takes a while for them to begin to open up to one another. Other couples will enter counseling too enmeshed in their problems, determined to a fault to find a solution and quickly. They are nervous that their problems may spell their demise and have difficulty taking a step back to find a solution.
This was the case of James and Krissie. Krissie had sensed James “pulling away” about a year ago, after he took on a new job. She was sure he was having an affair and brought it up to him on a daily basis. For close to a year, at the end of their work day, they would argue about this presumed affair, to the point where both were exhausted.
James had developed a new set of friends at work and Krissie, in turn, had very few friends in her neighborhood. When they dug a little deeper, it was discovered that Krissie’s “affair” included the new life James was having, without her. It was a life she wanted for herself – one of independence, success and new friends – but was having trouble obtaining.
But first, Krissie had to take a step back from her need to find out so much about James. She had to “re-enter her life”, as the counselor put it. Problems are often solved between couples when two enmeshed people take a step back, focus on their own individual lives and then re-approach.
Related Posts
- Letting Go to Come Together in Marriage Counseling
- Marriage Counseling and Letting go of the Past
- The Art of Letting Go in Couples Counseling
- The Art of Letting Go through Couples Counseling
- Letting Love Breathe Through Couple’s Counseling
