Marriage Counseling – Maintaning the Lessons
This is probably a scenario many of us can relate to: you read a self-help book and it feels incredibly transformational; all sorts of advice that resonates with you. You say to yourself, “This is exactly what I needed. It’s as if the author spoke to me.” You feel like a new person, with a new direction…at least for a while. Then slowly but surely you find yourself slipping into the same old habits again.
Couples counseling can be similar.
Once your marriage or relationship is on the right track, you’re both feeling more positive and connected and you know how to communicate better, there’s a collective sigh of relief. And then, occasionally, a “letting go” occurs. You feel like your relationship is “fixed” and you can safely go back to your old ways.
To some extent, this is true. You don’t need to be in examination mode every day with your relationship. You did go the couples therapy so you could return to your life in a normal healthy fashion.
But the lessons in couples counseling need to maintained and tended to, like a garden. “Slipping off” is a common occurrence several months after therapy. At that point, more than ever, you must maintain and revisit the lessons you learned.
One couple would talk about that their marriage every Saturday morning, over coffee; a sort of “check-in” to see if they were practicing what they had learned. They had been close to divorce so they felt it was really imperative to keep the proverbial ball rolling.
So like those self-help books, couples counseling can be incredibly enlightening. But without maintenance, you may find your marital garden needs tending again. Figure out a way that works for you and your partner to maintain and practice the lessons that were learned.
Related Posts
- Marriage Counseling – Lessons that Last
- Marriage Counseling Versus Individual Counseling
- Family Counseling and Marriage Counseling
- Religion and Marriage, When There’s an Issue and How Marriage Counseling Can Help
- Is Your Marriage Running on Empty? Marriage Counseling Can Help
