Marriage Tips Need Not Be Revolutionary
It’s in small things that you find great pleasures in your life. Imagine calling up a friend after years and he/she readily agrees for a drink with you in the evening. Imagine asking your spouse to cook a certain dish or mow the lawn and see the work done by evening. Imagine the hug your kid gives you when you let him/her watch television for a little longer. In our effort to achieve the bigger things in life, we often forget the smaller ones that have the power to make your day. In marriage, too, we often tend to look at the expectations we have of each other, not the small gestures we showed when we were falling in love.
A marriage counselor cannot tell you how to bring back the small pleasures in your life. Of course, he/she will make you familiar with the big picture and show you the way to make your marriage happy, but it is up to you to bring small pleasures back into your life. Mort Fertel’s marriage advice revolves around these small things.
Now, a small gesture will not make a revolutionary change in your marriage, but it will definitely bring a small tide of positive change. In one of his articles, Fertel suggests you have a ‘Yes’ day for your spouse. Agree to everything he/she says. Whether it’s making a drink of his/her choice, switching to his/her favorite program on TV, doing the laundry, or picking up kids from school, do everything you are asked to. Your spouse is bound to feel pampered at the end of the day.
Remember, simple relationship tips go a long way in making a strong foundation for your marriage.
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I find that in a marriage couple situation, i have each partner write a list of 10 actions, that if the spouse did these actions, he or she would feel loved. Have the other partner make a commitment to do these actions over the next couple of months, creates a nice flow in the relationship.