The Importance of Relaxing while Communicating
As we explore more deeply the intricacies of communication in couples counseling, we must recognize another critical component, which is being in a relaxed state prior to discussing the matter at hand. Some people think this is a near impossibility. “How can I possibly be relaxed when I’m so angry at this person! And even if I start off relaxed, once I hear her speak, all bets are off.” No, you don’t have to be a saint. Being relaxed while communication doesn’t mean you’re not feeling anger or sadness; it means simply that you’re maintaining your breathing and staying centered and keeping an even keel.
Here’s some other advice about relaxed communication that can apply to the workplace as easily as your home life:
Relax and center before meeting. If we’re anxious about providing critical feedback, or feeling frustrated or resentful about another person’s behavior or performance, we might be tempted to head into a feedback-sharing discussion in a state of stress. The better choice is, after reviewing tips like these to put the discussion in proper perspective, is to take a few minutes to relax, breathe slowly and deeply, remember our highest intentions for the meeting and for sharing our feedback. Whether you say a prayer or borrow a few relaxation or mindset management tips from your favorite athlete or self-help book, making an effort to relax and center will make a positive difference in the tone of your meeting, and you’ll be more likely to be skillful rather than reactionary in your discussion.
Once you create a relaxed environment with your partner, even if he or she is upset, they will often be balanced by your tone. Anger spirals. Relaxation neutralizes and allows for a more productive talk about your marriage. Easy? No. But as adults, we owe it to ourselves to present ourselves in a mature and relaxed manner. Temper tantrums just don’t cut it anymore!
Related Posts
- Communicating without Attacking
- Are You Communicating Enough?
- Communicating in Marriage Counseling
- The Importance of the Right Couples Therapist
- The Importance Of Pre-Marital Counseling
