Choosing the Right Kind of Therapy for You and Your Partner
Marriage counseling can often pave the way for individual counseling. There are times a couple’s counselor feels it more appropriate for one or both individuals to enter counseling privately. This can be for a number of reasons. Sometimes a client needs that “one on one” privacy to discuss issues he/she is having difficulty discussing in front of the partner. Occasionally, as well, one partner is having a very specific problem that needs the help of an individual therapist first, before addressing problems related to the couple.
Here are some general types of counseling you may encounter or ask questions about, prior to your therapy:
* Therapy with more of a focus more on the past – family of origin, earlier life difficulties, how the present is rooted in past experience.
* Therapy with more of the focus more on the present – regardless of the past, what is happening in the here and now, what choices are being made, whether the results are satisfactory.
* Focus on thoughts and behaviors – the ways we understand or interpret things that are happening in our lives, and what actions we take
* Focus on emotions – how we feel about the things that are happening in our lives
* Focus on the body itself – how the things happening in our lives show up as stress in physical armature and physical reactions.
Of course, therapists can use elements of various types of therapy - a more eclectic approach. Some approach it in a “layered” manner, focusing on the past for some time before proceeding to how these issues are manifesting in the body, for instance. Ultimately, it’s your choice. If you are a type who thinks that reflecting on the past is a waste of time, then you may want to focus on a therapy more appropriate to your “now” philosophies.
Of course, with couples, you have to decide who is right for both of you, which can be trying when you are encountering friction and dissension. Bottom line: a good therapist can help, regardless of their school of thought. It’s better than staying in the same cyclical and stuck place with your partner.
