Marriage Counseling to Quell the Chaos
Cole and Phoebe entered marriage counseling because of their almost continuous arguing and backbiting. They each felt like they were at their wit’s end and the only thing they seemed to agree on was that if the fighting went on much longer, they would separate. As Cole and Phoebe gave the couples counselor a basic run down of their daily lifestyle it became clear that some changes needed to be made in their home.
According to Cole:
Our home is a disaster. Literally. It’s a complete mess. With 2 kids under four years old, there are toys everywhere. We started redecorating before Jack, our youngest, was born…but we never finished it and now we’re stuck in limbo. The mail is everywhere. I can never find bills when I sit down to pay them. Our house is chaos, our lives are chaotic and I just want some peace back. I don’t even like going home because its like stepping into a tornado.
Cole was right in that something did need to be done, but he wasn’t thinking about the depth of his part in the solution. While the couple did need to address the way they were communicating with one another, they also had to make their lives more orderly, so there weren’t so many external factors coming into play. When the counselor suggested that perhaps Phoebe was overwhelmed and needed help with housework and raising the children, he began to see that she was stuck in the chaos too, and just as unhappy.
The counselor suggested that they hire a house cleaner for a weekly call and arrange a weekly sitter for date night. After several months, their house seemed more sane and orderly and they found their arguments were less, too.
Marriage counselors often step into the chaos and guide a couple in finding happiness in a more peaceful home.
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- Counseling for Marriage in Crisis
