How Do You Manage Your Anger?
What do you do when you get angry?
- Take it out on the source of your anger
- Try to hold it for the time being and make your spouse/partner your vent later in the day
- Unable to do anything about it, get agitated on yourself
- Plan to take revenge from the one who caused the anger
Most of us will choose one answer from the list given here. However, none of these is the right way to deal with anger. It is not simple to explain what the right way is, but it definitely involves two things: calming yourself down and thinking about the repercussions of your angry reaction.
Anger not only destroys your peace but also spoils your close relationship. And if you get angry frequently, you need to do something about it. More often than not, your spouse/partner or a friend will tell you that you have an anger management problem. Don’t shirk away their concerns. If they have been saying it too often, there is a problem.
Dr. Masty Tashman, acclaimed marriage and family therapist, mentions a five-step approach to controlling your anger.
- Rate yourself on Dr. Marty’s “Anger Scale”. On a scale of 1 – 10 rate how angry you are: (1) being mildly angry to (10) being intensely upset and out of control.
- Step back from the angering event and calm yourself.
- Understand the anger’s origin
- Think about how these angry feelings have left you with a sense of loss of control – (Only do this after 20 to 30 minutes after doing steps 1 and 2.)
- Develop a plan about how you can regain control.
Remember, your anger is one of the major factors that have the potential to ruin your relationship. If you cannot control it on your own, seek therapy.
Related Posts
No related posts.
