Marriage Counseling – Breaking the Stigma Trap
One of the most difficult aspects of marriage counseling can be getting started. Most couples experience a myriad of reactions when the subject is broached.
Here are some common resistance-based refrains:
“I don’t like airing my dirty laundry. If we have a problem, we’ll fix it ourselves.”
“I don’t want some quack or head shrinker telling me what to do.”
“I can’t seem to bring it up to him. I’m just too nervous. Right now, we’re not fighting and I don’t want to cause a problem where there isn’t any.”
“I feel like a failure by going to a shrink. It’s like I’m admitting that our marriage stinks. And what if someone finds out? I would be really embarrassed.”
There’s a stigma that still surrounds counseling – one that has been slowly dismantled after years of successful, qualified therapists practice their skills. This stigma is based in fear, pride and occasionally, ignorance. The term “shrink” is still bandied about – even by people seeing “shrinks”!
What you need to remember is psychology has come a long, long way. It has a proven track record. It isn’t a form of black magic or new age rhetoric; it’s a science that examines human behavior in depth and can enact permanent and healthy changes in people.
Finally, the stigma that seems to cling the most? The inability to ask for help when you need it. Many of us feel our “dirty laundry” is better left dirty…and private. Until we recognize that there is real power and strength in reaching out for help, we remain stuck. Opening up and revealing those painful secrets and feelings is therapeutic in and of itself. When its done in a safe environment with trained individuals, then you can see dramatic change.
Related Posts
- The Stigma Surrounding Counseling
- Marital Counseling – Taking the Stigma Out of the Equation
- Preventing A Long Term Marriage From Breaking Up
- Breaking the Addictive Argument Cycle
- The New History of Marriage Counseling
