The Reality Stage of Relationships Hit Home
Counselors that specialize in relationship therapy are well versed in the commonly accepted five stages that characterize a normal long term relationship. Counselors can use this knowledge to help educate couples who believe they are alone in dealing with the issues, thoughts and troubles that are found in these stages. Understanding that their relationship and its ups and downs are a part of a normal cycle is a key step in helping many couples move on with a healthier, happier relationship.
The first stage discussed was the Romance, or Honeymoon Stage, characterized by a sense of extreme happiness, newness, excitement and positivity.
The next stage in the Relationship Cycle is the Reality Stage. It is, quite literally, when the reality of it all hits home.
The Reality Stage
In this stage, couples are passing by the initial rush of excitement and desire that characterized their relationship previously and entering into a more predictable routine. Many of the issues faced in this stage seem out of line with the assumptions that they had built about one another earlier. The distancing that seemed slightly mysterious before now comes across as an irritating habit of avoidance. The witty conversationalist becomes a partner who never seems to stop talking. The negative aspects of traits that were once amusing and interesting now play a larger role.
Oftentimes there is a dramatic increase in feelings of disappointment and eventually isolation. This is a challenging stage that many couples simply do not overcome and is the stage with a very high risk of relationship failure. Misinterpreting this very normal transitional stage for incompatibility is a common reaction.
Related Posts
- Childrearing Stage Isn’t Always a Bundle of Joy
- Finding New Success in the Accommodation Stage
- Stages of Long Term Relationships
- Woods’ Marriage Counseling Takes Center Stage
- Plans in Place at Home, Before Counseling




Couples have many options for keeping things fresh in a relationship. I like to ask my clients to recall their courtship, what they did on their first dates, and what made them fall in love with each other. Re-focusing on your partner and your commitment can motivate you to maintain the interest and excitement in one another.